Bringing Small Comforts ~ CrazySexyCancer

"Life is a terminal condition, cancer patients are just more aware of it."

When women are faced with a medical challenge, a powerful weapon of choice should be knowledge. Kris Carr was deadly serious about her diagnoses of Stage 4 cancer in 2003. Given no option but experimental treatment for her rare and incurable type of cancer, the 31 year old actress and photographer sets out to explore any and all options. Even the crazy alternative ones. She refers to her cancer journey as an adventure story, a catalyst for a personal revolution. She is a warrior princess who wears cowboy boots. She wanted to kick cancer in the butt. And so far she has.

Kris Carr is crazy in a good kind of way. She is a CrazySexyCancerCowgirl (her term) and I think her knowledge and how she shares it is pretty powerful stuff. Millions do, you may have seen her on Oprah last year and remember her story. I am just reminding you so you can arm your friend with her own copy of this bestselling DVD and book to help her kick that stupid cancer as hard as she can. This can be your long distance gift, both books and DVD can be ordered directly from her site or on Amazon. Visit the CrazySexyCancer website and make sure you watch the 7 minute movie trailer of this DVD, it will give you goosebumps. It is sometimes funny, sometimes crazy, and her message that "healing is about living rather than fighting" is a really essential one for your friend right now. Just one more weapon.
Top photo by Brian Fassett via wow-womenonwriting.com/Product photos from CrazySexyCancer.com

Bringing Small Comforts ~ Let's Talk

I know this subject is hard. It feels like I am dripping in emotion this week as I write more and more in this series Bringing Small Comforts. I know this isn't the fun stuff that we usually talk about on blogs, especially one that is supposed to be about gifts and gift wrapping. I have written ahead a bit so I will admit that it is a draining subject for me to write and for you to read. Then I think to myself "I feel drained? So what? This is not about me and so for now we are going to keep talking about support until I am wrung dry or you tell me to stop, whatever comes first. OK? I promise some pretty "doorstep" gifts and gift wrapping are ahead.

We can have lots of excuses when we look for them, but nobody can really say I don't have time, I'm too busy. Not when someone is sick, alone, bored, worried, and needs her close circle of friends. It is that simple. "I don't have time, I'm too busy" is such an overused expression these days. We use it so easily and so conveniently that we really should give our heads a shake or two don't you think? I am not even talking about saying it out loud, heaven forbid it always sounds downright ridiculous, I am talking about telling ourselves this exact excuse in order to avoid something that we perceive as uncomfortable, awkward, unthinkable. Fellow blogger Trish Jett of A Femme d'un Certain Age commented to me that when two friends were faced with cancer she asked them what she could do to bring them pleasure, Anything in her power she told them....... anything. "Just come and see me, don't avoid me, talk to me" . There it is in a nutshell don't you think? Don't avoid me. Our hearts may be there with them in illness or grief, but we avoid looking them in the eye. The mind shuffles itself in a protective manner and visiting the friend you love while they are in pain or suffering is way too painful for some, for many of us. Every instinct tells us to look away. So what am I saying in this most awkward way? I am repeating this isn't about you. You call, you call again, and get over there and sit with your friend and just visit. Just grab your keys and go. Short visits. Frequent visits. Don't give her the chance to say "don't worry about it, I know you are busy". Her reply is female code for "I know how uncomfortable this is for you". Pay no attention and go as often as you can, make it comfortable. Be a pest. Look her in the eye. Be a good listener. We can do this.







Photo from Photographer's Limited editions via the blog Beautiful Things To Share/blog link to A Femme d'un Certain Age